ONE

Today was my first day in my mainstream look. I tried to dye my hair blonde yesterday but my natural colour is too dark so it just came out kind of yellow-ish at the roots. I also put on some fake nails this morning and then picked them off, one by one, because false nails are the most hideous things in the universe and are an invention of Satan.

I went to The Collective, Ike's Bookshop, a little second-hand place called Nuggets and Gems and Wakaberry today with a friend, who laughed at me for approximately five minutes before she recovered herself and said "you look irritating". My family are also cooing over me at every opportunity telling me how pretty I look. I've been getting some attention today, obviously not as much as last week, but it's still there. Funny enough, I'm still getting mostly dirty looks from girls, and of course, a lot more male attention. A girl had to smack her boyfriend today when he looked at me as I walked past.

Also, I have stumbled upon a theory. I think the reason "preppy", or girly girls are always so irritable and catty is because when you're wearing the Pretty Disguise, everything is irritating.

- The wind irritates you because it messes your hair that you've spent at least half an hour washing, blow drying, straightening and styling.

- Your hair irritates you because it keeps getting caught in your lip gloss.

- Your lip gloss irritates you because you have to re-apply it every time you eat or drink.

- Food irritates you because it can possibly get on your carefully chosen clothes.

- Your clothes irritate you because you have to constantly worry that they are in place, that they are not too tight, that your barely-there skirt is not riding up.

- Your feet irritate you because they've been painfully shoved into high heels.

- Your bangles irritate you because of that stupid sound they're constantly making.

No wonder those girls always look so grumpy.